Hello to all! I'm a comedy writer for Dan's Papers in New York. This blog contains unedited, uncensored columns. Follow me on Twitter at sallyflynnknows. God bless us, everyone...
Thursday, October 14, 2010
It’s a Good Thing to Know Jack
http://www.pumpkinnook.com/facts/jack.htm “The Irish brought the tradition of the Jack O'Lantern to America. ...The Jack O'Lantern legend goes back hundreds of years in Irish History. As the story goes, Stingy Jack was a miserable, old drunk who liked to play tricks on everyone: ... even the Devil himself. .... Stingy Jack made the Devil promise him not to take his soul when he died. Once the devil promised not to take his soul, Stingy Jack removed the crosses (that held him in the tree- sic) and let the Devil down.
Many years later, when Jack finally died, ... He was not allowed to enter heaven. ...and ... The Devil ...would not allow him to enter Hell. Now Jack was scared and had nowhere to go but to wander about forever in the darkness between heaven and hell. He asked the Devil how he could leave as there was no light. The Devil tossed him an ember from the flames of Hell to help him light his way. Jack placed the ember in a hollowed out Turnip... For that day onward, Stingy Jack roamed the earth without a resting place, lighting his way as he went with his "Jack O'Lantern".
On all Hallow's eve, the Irish hollowed out Turnips, rutabagas, gourds, potatoes and beets. They placed a light in them to ward off evil spirits and keep Stingy Jack away. These were the original Jack O'Lanterns. In the 1800's a couple of waves of Irish immigrants came to America. The Irish immigrants quickly discovered that Pumpkins were bigger and easier to carve out. So they used pumpkins for Jack O'Lanterns.”
That’s the official story, but I know my tribe, and I just wonder how this jack o’lantern idea really started.
Sometime in the 1800’s, in October, on a cold night in Ireland:
“Wife throwed you out again, Paddy?”
“Aye, she did, Brady. I seed your campfire from the road, you won’t be mindin’ if I stay here tonight will ya?”
“Stay as long as you like. The big pumpkins here are good for sitting. I hollowed out one to keep me pail of beer cold.”
“Where’d you get beer?”
“Seamus Tooley has a shanty half mile that way. He makes home brew. He’ll sell you a pint for a copper.”
“Ach, the night’s as black as coal, I’d never find me way there or back.”
“True, and you can’t carry a torch, Seamus will take you for a thief and club you before you get within twenty feet of his beer.”
“How could I let him know a friendly face approaches, from far off you know, so as not to alarm him?”
“You could call out as you approach, but with the wind blowin’ so, it’s unlikely you’ll be heard.”
“Well now, maybe I could make a friendly face to precede me.... look at this little gourd. I could carve it out, carve a face in the side and maybe scoop out a little basin in the bottom to put in some oil in and he’d see a smiling face from afar. What do you think, Brady?”
“It’ll never work, Paddy. You don’t look anything like that gourd.”
“Well I’m not carvin’ a bust you fool, just a likeness, an image. I just want a pint.”
“Use a small pumpkin instead. It’s rounder and looks more like your ugly mug.”
“It’s a kind hearted man ye are, Brady.”
“Soft in the heart, aye, it’s always been me downfall.”
An hour later...
“I’m off, Brady. Wish me luck.”
An hour after that, Brady peers into the darkness...
“Mother of ....Paddy! Is that you?”
“Tis so! You can see me pumpkin lantern from this far out?”
“Aye! Did ye get yer pint?”
“I did indeed. And look over there.....see? There’s two more pumpkin lanterns heading to Seamus’s. That’s Poreg and Michael. I near scared them to death with me lit pumpkin lookin’ like it’s floating through the air on it’s own as I went past their shack. They’re heading for beer too.”
“Bless me, Paddy, it’s a brilliant man you are. You’ve found a way for a man to travel in the dark without being mistook for a robber.”
“I’m naming me pumpkin helper here, Jack, Jack O’Lantern.”
“It’ll help me too, as long as I see Jack, I’ll know it’s a friend.”
“They say “Necessity is the mother of invention”, but me, Brady, I think it’s beer. Beer is the mother of invention.”
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