Saturday, April 09, 2005

Charles & Camilla, Best in Show

Well, they finally made it. I'm happy for them. Charles was forced into an arranged marriage with Diana and it ended bad for both of them. He always wanted Camilla. Now he has her.

The really good news is that they're too old to reproduce because neither of them is remotely attractive and any offspring would have to be kept in the secret cellar for ugly royal children.

I think of that underrated, but hysterical movie, 'Dirty Rotten Scoundrels' starring Michael Caine and Steve Martin. Steve plays a character called Ruprick, a deranged royal child kept chained to a wall. It gave me a great idea for managing my teens. It's not a cruel as it sounds. My teens never complain about the chains. Probably the crushed valium in their gruel helps...

My daughter will be 18 in 114 days, 6 hours and 17 minutes. That means in 114 days, 6 hours, and 18 minutes I will have one teen left to launch on my way to freedom!

I know what you're thinking... if they're that much trouble, why did I have them? There's a perfectly logical explanation. It was a party, I had a little wine, my husband looked good to me....I think it was my husband... oh well, who can remember the details after all this time?

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