It’s good to have an event or marker of some kind to mark the end of the Thanksgiving holiday and the beginning of the Christmas season. For some people it’s “Black Friday”, but on the Island a new tradition has been born. Last Saturday, the Island Library organized it’s first annual “Turkey Plunge” where Islanders, dressed in bizarre costumes to deflect you from thinking how crazy this is, ran into the freezing cold water, a la Polar Bear style, for money. So much for bake sales and car washes, when all else fails, be willing to freeze off body parts. $13,000 was raised, so this will become an annual event. The oldest - and I vote the bravest - polar bear was Mimi Brennan at 82 years young. Ava Czeladko won for Best Female Costume with her interpretation of how to look like a turkey using long clown balloons, the Island is submitting her as a float in the Rose Parade. Michael Badger won for Best Male Costume dressed as King Neptune with mop head for a wig and a trident. He spoke in a voice that sounded like Mickey Mouse during his acceptance speech, matter of fact, all the men sounded like Mickey Mouse for awhile. Without a doubt, this will become an annual event and the one-ups-manship will begin right away.
November 1, 2011 will hear conversations like this.
“What are you going to be for the Turkey Plunge this year, Joe?”
“Well, I’m not running into the water with a mop on my head looking ridiculous, I’ll tell you that! I’m going in as Godzilla. I’m going to adapt a wet suit and have red eyes that light up.”
“How you gonna do that, Joe?”
“I’m putting a little battery pack on my head inside the costume, and when I click a button, laser eyes!”
“Yea, but Joe, there’s something about electricity and water that don’t mix. What if you get a short in your shorts? Could be painful.”
“Nah, not the way I have it figured. I’m putting the batteries in a ziplock bag. What could go wrong? What about you, what are you going as?”
“Swamp Thing. I’m adapting a wet suit too. And I figure I can grab some skinny girl on the beach and take her into the water with me, you know, like I’m carrying her off to my underwater lair.”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea? I mean the suit would weigh a lot with a Swamp Thing head on it and carrying a girl down the beach. I hate to throw sand in your shorts, but you had a four way bypass last year.”
“So? I’m fine now. I’ll make sure to grab a skinny girl, not more than a buck ten.”
“And you’re going to carry a hundred and ten pounds across the beach and into freezing water without stressing your heart?”
“What are you, my wife? If I want to hear that negative crap, I’ll talk to Karen. I’m going to be Swamp Thing. You just wish you thought of it first.”
“No way. Godzilla beats out Swamp Thing any day. Godzilla breathes fire.”
“Yes, but Swamp Thing got Adrienne Barbou.”
“I wonder if I could hook up a little propane tank to my thigh and run a tube to my mouth and breathe fire.”
“Joe, I think you ought to stop at the laser beam eyes. I’m not sure the propane in your pants is a good idea.”
“You just concentrate on carrying a hundred and ten pounds across a beach, leave my propane to me. I can’t wait to fire that baby up and let ‘er rip!”
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