Now Being Served: Client No. 9
I genuinely pity Eliot Spitzer. He attended Harvard and Princeton, married well, had three lovely daughters, worked his way up to governorship of New York State. At 48 years old, if he did a good job in New York, he might have been chosen as VP on the Democratic ticket in 2012, and from there, maybe the Presidency. Yes, it was all going so well. But power corrupts. I could almost nominate him for a Darwin Award for being phenomenally stupid. Talk about shooting yourself in the foot. Okay, maybe a little higher, but he essentially ended his life. He lost his job, position, and will probably and deservedly be disbarred. His wife, I'm betting, will divorce him as more revelations surface about how long he used professional services. And his teenaged daughters, who have now seen their mother weep bitter tears, won't ever feel the same about him. And you can bet that as adult women, they will have major trust issues with men. Spitzer probably thinks he's the only victim here.
Silda, such a trained political wife, stood neatly dressed behind him, as he carved her heart out with a spoon. I hope she cleans him out. She deserves the best possible life. God Bless her.
It's a good thing Spitzer wasn't a Shelter Island man. Most of the gals on the Island would not have stood quietly behind their cheating husband while he announced how penitent he was. I've taken an informal survey and I'd like to advise any men in Shelter Island politics not to expect their wives to stand behind them in their moment of betrayal, as they have different ideas for atonement. An Island woman would have beaten him to death with one of the folding chairs from the front row.
Now, with horror, Silda and the rest of the country get to watch the call girl rake in the profits with centerfolds, TV interviews and movies of the week.
When did shame go out of style? As a parent, I made certain my children understood that there are behaviors that are shameful for which you should feel guilty and remorseful. Society uses guilt and shame to curb aberrant behavior, but apparently that ban is lifted if you make a lot of money doing it, or if it involves someone famous.
"Hi Mary, you busy tonight?"
"Hi Sally, no, what's up?"
"I'm short for the rent money, I thought I could service some guys at the bar."
"Sally! That's horrible! You're kidding right?"
"No, no, you don't understand. The guy at the bar I'm targeting is in the Suffolk County Legislature. He'll pay me not to publish the pictures. I'm bringing whipped cream and a chicken - the kinky stuff really brings in the bucks."
"What pictures?"
"The ones you'll be taking."
"That's prostitution and blackmail!"
"No, no, it's a public service. We're exposing a County official for the two-timing, lying cheat that he is."
"Wait, that's still wrong. I can't be part of that."
"Yea, but we'll get about $5,000 from him for the pictures and the newspapers will give us even more."
"But if we sell the pictures to him, we can't double cross him and sell them to the newspapers. He's a County Legislator, he's a powerful guy."
"Please, he'll resign ten minutes after the pictures come out. No threat there. I think I should get my hair done for the TV interviews. They pay like $50,000 each. You and Don can get the new boat."
"$50,000? Boy that's tempting. But I'll be selling out my integrity. Everyone will be talking about me."
"Well that's the nice thing about owning a boat, you can't hear people talking about you over the roar of the engine and the clinking ice in your glass."
"Hang on, Don just woke up. Let me put him on the phone with you."
"Okay."
5 minutes later....
"Hi, so what did Don say? It's a bad idea right?"
"Nope. He said he's going upstairs to get the better camera for you to bring. He wants a double outboard."
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